On Hope

Posted by admin on Nov 11, 2008 in life | 0 comments

“For many months, we’ve been teased, even derided for talking about hope. But we always knew that hope is not blind optimism. It’s not ignoring the enormity of the tasks ahead or the roadblocks that stand in our path.

It’s not sitting on the sidelines or shirking from a fight. Hope is that thing inside us that insists, despite all the evidence to the contrary, that something better awaits us if we have the courage to reach for it and to work for it and to fight for it.”

Barrack Obama’s Iowa Victory Speech 4th Jan 2008.

For someone who lived his life depending on hope more than anything for the past five months, this is a passage that reads like all great inspiring texts. Although in a totally irrelevant context, words have powers that heal, and add new fuel to a withering fire at a time when somebody’s faith has been put repeatedly under the test.

At times of atrocity the power of hope and dreams become most apparent. The greatness in Obama’s speeches lies in how he reminds people the importance of believing in hope again, that entire nations were built upon the foundation of hopes and dreams, that civilizations were propelled forward because individuals dared to hope and acted accordingly.

If only we could all share a bit of that belief and faith, we probably would become stronger and more apt in dealing with the miseries and challenges that drag us down.

on meeting jerry

Posted by admin on Aug 20, 2008 in life | 0 comments

It’s not like you get to meet an Internet legend everyday, so last Friday I was happily expecting Jerry’s visit to the HK office.

I’ve never been a Jerry basher and I have a lot of respect for him for sticking two fingers up the ass of Steve Balmer. Although not often rightfully praised by the media, fact is, he and Filo did create the biggest and greatest establishment on the net and changed the lives for millions.

In flesh, he’s actually more easy-going and friendlier than you’d expect. Yes, there was the expected yang style blabbing of mission statements that we have heard so much before. And Yes, I don’t think it made much of a difference in terms of boosting morale and all (he probably wasn’t trying to do that anyway). But in the end of the day, it felt good to have a living legend coming to tell you that he’s proud of what you’ve done. Phew. Try to top that.

While not a direct influence, their vision and achievement do remind me of why I went down this path in the first place – to create something meaningful and leave behind a legacy of inspirations.

Thanks to Alex for snapping this pic for me. It does make me seem a bit closer to that ideal.

What a script

Posted by admin on Feb 24, 2008 in life | 0 comments

Contemporary journalism at its finest.

Today, I’ve come back to Hong Kong to stand before you and account for myself. I’ve never escaped from my responsibility.

During the past a few weeks, I’ve been with my mother and my family and loved ones to show support and care, and, at the same time, have their support and care for me.

I admit most of the photos being circulated on the Internet were taken by me. But these photos were very private and have not been shown to people, and were never intended to be shown to anyone.

These photos were stolen from me illegally and distributed without my consent. There is no doubt whoever obtained these photos had been uploading them on the Internet with malicious and deliberate intent.

This matter has deteriorated to the extend that the society as a whole has been effected by this, and in this regard, I am deeply saddened.

I would like now to apologise to all the people for all the suffering that has been caused and the problems that have arisen from this.

I would like to apologise to all the ladies and to all their families for any harm or hurt that they’ve been feeling. I’m sorry.

I would like to also apologise to my mother and my father for the pain and suffering that I cost them during these past few weeks.

Most importantly, I would like to say sorry to all the people in Hong Kong. I give my apology sincerely to you all, unreservedly and with my heart.

I know young people in Hong Kong look up to many figures in our society, and in this regard, I have failed, I have failed as a role model. However, I wish this matter would teach everyone a lesson. To all the young people in our community: let this be a lesson for you all. This is not an example to be set for you.

During my time away, I’ve made an important decision. I will wholeheartedly fulfill all commitments that I have to take, but after that, I’ve decided to step away from the Hong Kong entertainment industry.

I’ve decided to do this to give myself an opportunity to heal myself and to search my soul. I will delicate my time to charity and community work within the next few months. I will be away from Hong Kong entertainment indefinitely; there is no time frame.

I’ve be assisting the police since the first day that the photos were published, and I will continue to assist them. After this press conf., I’ve obligations to help them with their investgation, and hope that this case can end soon, as everyone, I think, has the same wish.

I would like to use this opportunity to thank the police for their hard work on this case. Thank you.

I believe everyone’s priority now, my priority now, is to stop the suffering and the pain. For not letting this … we do not want to let this situation become more out of control. We need to protect all the innocent and all the young for matters like this. In this regard, I’ve been instructing my lawyers to do everything possible within the law to protect all the innocent victims of this case.

I believe that the press statements that are being issued as we speak are what my lawyers had advised me to do.

Lastly, I would like to thank everyone for coming here today, and listening to what I have to say. I would like to also apologise once again to all the ladies and their families, my family, and to everyone in Hong Kong and everyone in our society. I’m deeply saddened by this, and I apologise to everyone that has to go through this.

I would like to also thank you for giving me this opportunity to say what I’ve wanted to say all along in my heart. I hope, after today, I can have your forgiveness. With regard to this case, with everything, everything that had happened, I’m deeply sorry.

I hope you all would accept my apology, and give me a chance. Thank you.

Life @ march 07

Posted by admin on Mar 26, 2007 in life | 0 comments

Time is never time at all.

You can never ever leave without leaving a piece of youth

Faces old and new came and went. Gained a little at the expense of giving up a lot. Convinced the choices you make would take you one step closer to where you want to go. Wary of the thought of being tied down. Haunted by insecurity and inconfidence.

Sounds gloomy but these have been great times, in terms of activities and schedules. Somehow I just haven’t been able to strike a balance between working aggressively and having a healthy life. Admittedly, the concept that both can be achieved at the same time is a bit alien for me.

Work @ march 07

Posted by admin on Mar 26, 2007 in life | 0 comments

Been keeping my head real down lately. Though pretty much most of the work was self-initiated and probably proposed no value what-so-ever to anyone in particular, to me these petty tasks are most effective as reminders of self-sense of being.

Project is shaping up differently than expected. Can’t say I’m disappointed but I really wish it would make more of an impact eventually. What bothers me most perhaps is the lack of an organized structure, both front and back.

Not that I’m not aware of the states at risk. But shipping a hastily put together product is just irresponsible even by my standards. I hope that once the core stuff has completed, we could introduce a bit of discipline in this space. For now, “tag along but think a step ahead” seems to be the only rational path to take.

07

Posted by admin on Jan 1, 2007 in life | 0 comments

Time and again the career/self-help books tell us to “make goals” and keep track of progress. As a lazy cunt who casually believes things will work their way out and OTP planning takes the art and mystery out of everyday life, I found that hard to follow through.

But two months at Y! has undeniably worn off some of the self-esteem I built up during the two months of job seeking. Yes, it has been a great and fun time, but I’m not entirely satisfied with how I came through. Simply put, I don’t feel I’m living up to the promises I made and now feel like a kid afraid of being caught.

Is it really that bad? On the surface, I got myself known to the producers and some colleagues. I got to know a few of them relatively well. I completed two small tasks without seeking spoon-feeding type of help, on alien platforms and languages. Though not working as fast as people might have expected, I should have portrayed the image of a fast learning, experienced web developer with a reasonable level of creditability. Or at least I hope so. Without realizing, I probably allowed myself to slack a bit too much.

On the down side, yes I’m essentially the same as I was before. Those areas I wished to improve never made much of an impression.

So what next? Here are just some of the goals I logically should be heading towards, no matter how far fetched:

- Understand the logistics and maintenance of the servers. Be able to do some real troubleshooting.
- Know all there is about GSP and is able to perform upgrades to all the servers.
- Better time mgmt and design in new tasks…
- Get closer with other engineers!

Too generic isn’t it? Knowing where to go doesn’t necessarily know hot to get there. What I need now is work out a plan for reaching these objectives. The shyness thing and the get-together thing can be helped a little by bringing in the wii (yeah pathetic approach I know) and by following suggestions in certain books. As for technical, i don’t know, this shouldn’t really be an issue for me isn’t it? Afterall I’ve been in this situation time and time again. The only difference this time is really, a new set of systems and lack of useful documentation…these can be solved through self-observation and well, ASK!! Just go to work focused and awake, and have clear objectives of what to complete each day and week.

Well, obviously i haven’t a clue how to turn this rumbling post into something useful and thought provoking as I intended. I guess…should I lower the bar and say, just define goals and review them every month? That should be easier and the entire process would generate far less pressure.

Moving these plans to a more private part of the blog